I never thought I'd be the type to obsess over wall art decor, but life has a funny way of turning you into the very thing you once mocked. It all started when my partner asked the seemingly innocent question, "What to hang on a wall?" in our new apartment. Little did I know this would lead me down a rabbit hole of ceramic flora that would make Alice's Wonderland look like a barren wasteland. After weeks of aimless wandering through home decor stores, feeling like a colorblind painter in search of inspiration, we stumbled upon it - an extra large piece of mint sea lettuce, rendered in ceramic and meant to be hung on a wall. It was absurd, ostentatious, and absolutely perfect. This wasn't just wall art; it was a conversation piece, a statement, a ceramic middle finger to conventional decor. It looked like something that might have adorned Poseidon's rec room, if sea gods had rec rooms. Every time I glance at it, I half expect it to start swaying in an imaginary current. Now, when guests come over, their eyes inevitably drift to our ceramic sea lettuce. "Bold choice," they say, in tones ranging from genuine admiration to poorly concealed horror. I beam with pride, as if I'd grown and glazed the monstrosity myself. Who knew that the path to adulthood was paved with oversized, wall-mounted aquatic vegetables?